I keep remembering how he asked me to go with him when he had to have his old kitty Kit put to sleep. He cried in my arms afterwards and I rocked him. He asked me to hold his mother’s ashes for him when we all made the move to Colorado because I was going first and he knew I’d be very careful and respectful of the urn. He came to me for advice and I went to him for advice.

And then I called him on being hypocritical about something and he went nuts on me. He physically threatened me, tried to hurt me verbally with the most vicious things he could think of, and sent me taunting emails for years after we had stopped being friends. Some of you might remember that period because it was right around the time I started writing in a journal as well. So I know what he was capable of, but I also know he cried about his mom and his cat.

Well. Even my ex-husband cried after he’d killed my kitties. Maybe tears don’t mean much.